For the end of Ramadhan month here in Malaysia, we had a really long weekend off work. Caitlin’s school, in fact, had the whole week off (they had a couple of Saturdays of school to make up for closing the whole week).
It was also Hot Mummee’s birthday on the 21st Also, Yee yee (HM’s younger sister) is also back from Hawaii for a month; and it’s also going to be HM’s cousin’s wedding this weekend!
So we had quite a few activities lined up in the last 2 weeks or so!
As a nice little “cheap” treat, I brought Caitlin for a swim in our pool downstairs (of the condo building). Off and on I have been taking her floats out of her swimgear the last few times we went for a dip- she is tall enough already and can stand at the shallow end. She really surprised me by “going under” (as she calls it) and even remembering that one time I tried to teach her to exhale through her nose. I was watching her submerging and blowing bubbles out of her nose and really enjoy exploring this new skill and sensations!
The other highlight was also the rare times that we as a family ventured outdoors together! HM’s not really an outdoorsy person, and with Caleb being still somewhat waddling, we don’t venture outdoors much. But being somewhat bored with the days-off, we contacted Moomykin and Cuddlyfamily to see what they were doing.
We ended up planning a picnic!
The kids had the most fun, whilst I enjoyed (not enough of!) Moomykin’s decadent potato and egg salad and Cuddlyfamily’s homemade cookies! Most of my time was spent watching over the kids; more so with Caleb and (possibly?) his first visit to a playground.
The picnic wasn’t as scary as we had feared (okay we are city folks after all). The dreaded rain held off just for us, where it had been raining every 12 hours or so the previous umpteen days regardless of day or night, and also the kids weren’t too much of a handful.
After the picnic morning HM, Yee yee and I, and their brother and some friends went for karaoke (don’t laugh- all are quite good singers and it’s also good stress relief!), followed by seafood dinner- it was after all HM’s day, and she got to choose which crab, and the cooking style to eat!
So how many of us realise; and how often do we remind ourselves, that whatever we do, say, behave, respond to situations, treat our own loved ones and other fellow human beings, we are being watched by the little kids around us?
Sometimes when I make a passing remark, opinion, upcoming event or plans, Caitlin would recount it hours later asking for clarification. For example, there is an upcoming party for one of our cousin’s buck’s night party, so the kids will have to crash at Grandma’s for that evening. Hot Mummee called up Grandma to tell her of this plan. Caitlin was within earshot (and conducted in Cantonese even). She asked me about it later, why we have to make her sleep over at Grandma’s.
Yes she understood the whole arrangement and asked about the event; when we didn’t think her Cantonese was even that good!
My point is, we are their one and only role model in their still-little universe. As they see how Mummee and Daddee behave, as adults, and especially as a couple, they will slowly and surely subconsciously form the opinion that this is the way an adult, and a couple is supposed to behave.
Sure, we hold our tongues when we are about to cuss something that pisssed us right off, make sure we either change the channel or that they aren’t around when inappropriate tv-content comes on, but what about everyday behaviour? The way we drive, cuss at other drivers (if one is so inclined), jump queue? (I get asked this by Caitlin sometimes, but luckily I am a patient driver and I explain to her that there is no queue, merely changing lanes; HM on the other hand….
Our parents are the first couple-role model in our lives. I “realised” this when I was reading a self-help book many years ago when I was personally going through some difficult times- I believe the book is called Conscious Loving. From there, one can either choose to emulate, or go almost-opposite against, what they see of this model couple. I guess, in looking around, there are those who don’t realise this, and kinda almost emulate this model couple later in their adult life. I am generalising here, but folks with broken-family backgrounds tend to have similar relationships or choose not to commit. On a less serious level, families that speak very casually and loudly, almost rudely to their elders, tend to “spawn” the same type of behaviour in their kids.
Just somethings I have been casually thinking about lately, as a parent…..
So how do you behave in front of the “younglings”?
* Sorry, this is the first photo I used for this blog that isn’t originally mine! Courtesy of www.makemymood.com
If it weren’t for the plastic teapot that gives it away, you’d think (I hope) that he was going through and making notes of some of the white papers I had printed to read.
As one of the *good examples of Caitlin as the jie-jie is setting, Caleb has also taken an interest in doodling too. No that anything he’s “drawn” makes sense, but at least he’s getting the hang of holding a pencil.
Gotta watch him though, I have once caught him putting and chewing a red color pencil in his mouth. I had to warn the others in the house in case they Caleb has a bloody mouth! But I was pretty crossed with him.
*There are quite many which are bad examples set by the older sister, by the way.
Yup- it’s already going to be Friday already tomorrow.
Took today and Friday off from work, just to “do stuff” with Caitlin. All week so far she’s been holed up in the apartment with Hot Mummee working from home, and really working. Poor kids haven’t been outdoors at all for some 72 hours or so earlier in the week.
Today I took Caitlin for a long-awaited swim. Long, cos as you know she’s not been well, and then there was the hazy spell. Not surprisingly it was a good fun-time in the sun; we both got a slight but much needed tan from it. She hasn’t forgotten what she’s learnt from the pool- not that I had taught her a lot, but she still managed to paddle from the ends of the pool to the other, still with her floaties of course.
Later in the day I had wanted her to catch some shuteye before the replacement art class- again, replacement from when she was down with fever, but she won’t have it. 35min before the class was to start, this is what happened- I reckon she had only dozed off 5 minutes before I snapped this.
I still woke her up though, partly cos I was “selfish” and wanted her to still attend this cos, after all its paid for. But partly also I know (hoped?) she would still enjoy it.
Woke her, asked if she still wanted to go.
Rubbing her eyes, “Yes….”
When I signed her up for this replacement class last week, I had noticed that this session, being on a Thursday afternoon, only had 4 names. Today, she was the only one who turned up.
So, given the undivided attention, when I went to get Caitlin at the end of the class the teacher told me that because she was the only one, they had finished one, and resumed to make another
So for tomorrow, Friday, I was thinking I’d bring her to go watch Up. Let’s hope the plan goes well; cos I have a feeling somehow it won’t….
UPDATE
Well, we managed to catch the movie Up.
As usual Caitlin didn’t catch her afternoon nap. I had to force her to lie down with the threat of no-movie if she didn’t try. As the protesting died down because she eventually dozed off, I snuck out to get the tickets in order to maximise her shut-eye time, waking her only at the last minute.
As I woke her, it crossed my mind that she may want to continue sleeping as she normally does when awoken “prematurely”, ending up being a grump for about 30 minutes. Waking her, I popped the make-or-break question: Do you wanna go for the movie (or not)? It was quite the waker-upper question- we were on time and all for the movie.
To my slight disappointment, being her third ever movie outing, she still asked “Is it finishing yet?” some 3/4 way into the movie. She is still obviously not mature enough to follow a storyline yet the first time (meaning she’s gotta be watching a movie repeatedly like on a DVD before somewhat understanding what’s going on.
Ah well, at least she did go to a cinema and catch this movie, after months of requesting we do each time we drive past the poster on the highway every morning.
School kids nationwide are on holidays from this weekend on.
Caitlin has some holiday homework to do for the week off school, from (as far as I can see- gotta check her bag/books) 3 subjects of English, Malay and Chinese. Each of them have a date on the homework pages for respective dates of the week- yes, the teachers are pacing the kids so that they have homework each of the holidays.
Hot Mummee and I are of the opinion that Caitlin, whilst it’s a lazy-ish Saturday afternoon, that she can do as much of them as she can, even to have them all completed. Caitlin on the other hand, quite vehemently objects, saying that she should follow the pace that the teachers have set, to listen to what the teachers have told the class.
HM herself thinks that Caitlin is just being lazy, whereas I was seated beside her surfing whilst she was quite happily completing the homework that was set for the first few days- so I know she isn’t lazy per se.
What would you do? I kinda respect Caitlin’s respect for what the teachers have said, despite also somewhat agreeing with HM’s rationale to complete her homework early in the holidays.
When he first developed the fever on Sunday, we didn’t think much about it, only perhaps he’d caught something; maybe from his sister.
But you wouldn’t know it.
Caleb has been running around being his cheeky self, toddling around in circles at tv jingles, walking after HM when he sees her, playing and demanding the toys that Caitlin is playing (and Caitlin demanding it back). If you didn’t touch him, he certainly wasn’t showing any of the visual signs of suffering from fever.
Naturally worried, we took him to the nearby children’s clinic Tuesday evening- yup, it was already 36 hours since the fever started. The pediatrician kinda went “Yup, fever”, poked a spatula making Caleb puke on his floor, “Yup, sore throat, and stuffed nose too” and charged me RM80 for making us wait for him almost 3 hours (when we registered him we were told to come back in an hour. We did, and still had to wait our turn), and prescribed paracetamol and rhinothiol, two of which you can already buy from your neighbourhood pharmacy, and also what Dr Pixie’s already prescribed before.
Yesterday, Wednesday, his fever had subsided. Again, you wouldn’t know it because of his still normal (ie high!) level of energy. Last night in the lift on the way upstairs, HM was carrying him. He had knocked out- and I still thought Why not, he’s probably lethargic from the fever. I had noticed Caleb had rashes starting from his jawline going down under his pj’s collar. Since he was already asleep I didn’t endevour to examine him, and subsequently forgotten about checking him at all when he did wake for a while.
I made a conscious decision not to administer any more medication, since the fever was going away, and let his own defenses fight the other symptoms.
Today at work Grandma calls me and says the rashes seem to be getting worse. Since HM was mobile today, I left it to her to administer to the little man.
Tonite, after coming home from work and a work-related function, HM tells me that she had spent some time looking for another children’s clinic, and was about to go to a further suburb when Dr Pixie returned call (Dr Pixie’s hours were later in the evening, at the other side of KL, during very peak rush hour). Spoke to Dr Pixie about Caleb’s condition, and without mentioning beyond “Caleb’s got a rash and he’d just recovered from fever”, Dr Pixie correctly asked questions related to all the above conditions-
“Did he have fever for 3 days?”
“Yes…”
“Did he otherwise act all normal?”
“Yes..”
“The rash doesn’t seem to be annoying him in anyway, right?”
“No..”
Without reading all the contents of the above link to Wikipedia, HM says Dr Pixie said:
that kids aged under 3 get it;
there’s really nothing we can do;
nor need to do, and
it will go away eventually; probably also in 3 days.
Good thing Caleb left his mess on the dr’s floor. Honestly that was our second visit to that clinic with Caleb, both times the 2 different dr’s got their diagnosis wrong.
But just like Daddee being innocently ignorant about its proper description, Caitlin was referring to her new pair of shoes as the “up down shoes”.
Now you gotta really sit down and think about how she could possibly come up with a name like that. I did, yet still couldn’t work it out; where for a while we were both frustrated that we didn’t know what she was referring to.
Until I sat her down and asked her what up-down shoes.
And she went and got it to show me.
“Why did you call it the ‘up-down shoes’?”
She pointed to the heel. “See Daddee; up?” and pointed to the toe “Down”.
I was showing Caleb some of the videos I have taken; he does seem to like watching them too, and I kinda condone it ‘cos I remind him of who everyone is especially the relatives.
And by the way, having the radio going all the time while I drive, Caitlin has taken a liking to this currently popular song.
From a personal perspective, a great deal of how I learned English was also from songs, and “breaking down” the lyrics so that I could sing along (I suppose one also has to like music and singing to learn English this way, even if it’s only in the shower!) So, I found this YouTube clip while I was looking online for the lyrics for Caitlin to sing along too, as well.
My little girl is bobbing like she’s in a moshpit now; well, gentle bobs anyway. Maybe I should have left it for her to work out the lyrics herself too?
I was just going through the photo library on my laptop… and this just occurred to me.
Does this look like a hand of a 4 year old?
Maybe it does to you. To me it looks more like- maybe a 10 year old’s hand.
This was when Auntie Susan and Uncle Jonathan had lunch with us at Dragon-i. These pigs were desert dishes, I think there was lotus paste in them. Quite yummy too.
So she didn’t attend her 1st session of her art class (actually it would be her 2nd session, they allowed her a trial session last weekend to assess her: behaviour, “standard” of her skills like drawing & painting, etc, to decide which level / class to put her). We decided to let her try out these art classes to see how she goes with her keen interest in drawing and colouring.
So she stayed at home, despite very much looking forward to attending it. Sometimes she is such a darling with her “okaaay” when we explain how she can’t do something she really wants to.
Tried my best to keep her occupied, though she had already planned on an activity- to cook herself some soup.
ABC soup no less. Locals cook this with the most basic of ingredients: Tomato, onions, potatos.
She had wanted to add some beans too, and I insisted we added some peas too though she doesn’t really like them in real life.
In case you can’t tell, there’s the stove, the pot, and the ingredients. I helped her staple the ring to make up the pot
Yes, she is handling a pair of scissors. She started using them last year before turning 4 without my knowledge, to make things. Touch-wood she hasn’t hurt herself yet so far, and under my watchful eye since (when I do see her use it) she’s been quite okay with them. Let’s hope she remembers to keep them from her younger brother though.
I have this really old and (therefore) oversized tank top; probably got it from Petaling Street many years ago.
I wear it to bed, and sometimes don’t change out of it, and even go out getting take away lunch- it gets hot okay! Besides I am only going to get hawker-food lunch, nothing fancy (as long as HM isn’t with me she won’t get embarrassed).
Yesterday that was what I did. Came home and sat beside Caitlin to lunch together
She says to me, “Daddee, don’t wear that again” and gazed at the arm(pit) hole.
“Why not?”
“I can see things..”
The only times Caitlin sees me topless is when we go swimming. And even then she sometimes catches glimpses of the things when I hold her in the water- she doesn’t see me topless and my things often.
And I haven’t exactly been in the best shape these years. Now I have really scarred her for life, with my man-boobs.
It’s hard looking for tank tops now, the cheap Petaling Street type. The ones I managed to find the last time are kinda fitting and thick, defeating the purpose of wearing something light when it’s hot. But I guess I have a young lady in the house now, and I gotta respect her wish.
It still gets hot though… and it’s about time I do something about the man-boobs and tyres.
Nope- no photos with this post. Don’t wanna scar you even this late in your life…
Being the youngest I grew up with books and some comics already in the house (as well as contemporary music like The Carpenters, some Beatles, Glen Campbell, John Denver… Oh my I’m scaring myself while I list this)
One of the comics that sticks in my head is Peanuts: Charlie Brown & Snoopy, Linus & his security blanket, characters whose heads are way too big for their bodies.
I guess it’s not just the Peanuts specifically- I think in all comics & cartoons that, whenever a character is concentrating on a task, be it while writing, drawing, cutting, etc, that the character is drawn with his/her tongue out, as if in the midst of licking the upper lip. It seems like a universally accepted comic-body-language.
I have always wondered about this, even consciously stuck my tongue out hoping that my homework, drawing, whatever, would turn out nicer or better than usual. It didn’t work.
Then, I saw this only last night.
If you stick your tongue out, your work isn’t necessarily going to be good. But if you concentrate on the task at hand, the tongue comes out.
Try it.
Sorry for the quality of these photos. They are actually still frames from a video that I took of Caitlin’s tongue action with my iPhone- I freeze-framed these shots and screen captured them.
No I haven’t played them back to her yet. Hot Mummee just suggested that I do, and highlight this to her before she gets older and where kids are mean!
Grandma has a big clear plastic sheet over her fabric table runner/cover for her dining table. For practical purposes, it makes wiping down a lot easier after meals, preserving the cleanliness of the fabric underneath.
Caitlin was the last to finish her dinner; and Daddee had an engagement but came home to get the kids no-too-late that night. So I sat with her to chat and urge her to finish up.
An ant was crawling under the plastic sheet. Caitlin squashed it.
“… and the mummy and daddy will come looking for him and go AAARRGHHHH!”
Caitlin said something the other night and we shared a good laugh.
I mean a good laugh, you know the type that makes you laugh heartily, not the I am only entertaining or humoring you laugh.
It was in the evening, after dinner but before bedtime- I can still see it in my head. I was seated across her, she was in her blue short sleeved jammies, somewhat looking up at me, from her schoolbook homework; pretty sure she had a pencil in her hand.
She said the punchline. I found it really funny, and laughed longer and harder than usual.
She wasn’t conscious of herself like I thought she would, now that I think about it in retrospect. In the past she’d get somewhat self-conscious and demanded “Why you funny at me??” to which I often try to explain to her the difference between laughing at you, and laughing with you. I think she got this idea from possibly being teased at school, but not something or at a level that we should be concerned about.
So she laughed along. I think it was initially because she too thought it was a funny punchline, not going the “Why you funny at me” path; and then I think she kinda realised that Daddee was enjoying the joke, and joined in the hearty laugh.
I can still see it: In her blue jammies, the all teeth squinty eyed giggly hee-hee and occasionally mouth agape haha laugh.
Don’t ask me what it was that made us both laugh. I honestly cannot remember! The next morning I asked her, in the car on the way to school, and she too cannot remember!
But it was something else for me. It signaled that she is growing, that it wasn’t just simple things that made her laugh anymore; no, indeed it wasn’t what made her laugh but what she had said that made me laugh like I did.
Also, Yee yee (HM’s younger sister) is also back from Hawaii for a month; and it’s also going to be HM’s cousin’s wedding this weekend!
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