During our first Skype session after this same recent visit to Melbourne / seeing me after 5 months of my being here; matter of factly, she says to me “Daddee, everytime I think of you I feel like crying..” And moves on to another topic.

This one was from last year (late 2010):
Still within earshot when the restaurant staff walked past us, Caitlin asked: “Daddee, is that a boy or a girl?”

Yikes..

I think it was my brother’s handy work finding some fibre as pretend smoke..

To document their growth…

To make an album, or two, or three…

To be able to look back and remember when they were so tiny, so innocent, so adorable…

For they grow so fast…

This one costs $12.99. Maybe I should have bought it? Opening and closing the door switches the cargo inside! It’s on sale ‘cos it’s a Christmas toy

Caitlin is of a certain intellect already. We “connect” as we talk about stuff- and we can do that just by sitting down, in the car, at the table, and lately, over the internet on Skype. In fact with this latest medium, we also type messages to each other whilst I coach her on spelling them

Caleb however, is not at that level of intellect yet. We don’t “talk” per se- we play together. Though he understands stuff that is being said to him, he is still distracted by physical, tangible, more touch-sensory perception of the world and people around him than about to sit down and talk.

And so, he doesn’t miss me, not as much as his jie-jie does.

This was evident tonight. I got a message on my iPhone’s chat program from Caitlin, asking me to get on Skype to videochat, peppered with emoticons that she has recently taken to giggle at

And so we did, like usual, hearing and seeing each other on screen.

While talking to Caitlin and Hot Mummee for a while I saw Caleb in the background of the video chat. HM asked him to come talk to Daddee.

He didn’t want to.

I don’t blame him. There is no fun, at his level of intellect, to talk to Daddee in a window in the computer screen. There is no play involved like how it was with physical-Daddee; like how I’d play with his toys with him, kick the ball around with him, goof around with him.

I have said before that he will grow to not know his Daddee if we don’t hurry along our plans. This is perhaps the first step down that path.

I don’t have much time left.

Back in the days when I was away from home during overseas studies, we would rely solely on this almost A4-sized paper that was folded 3 times over and licked to seal.

Then when I was at uni, I was astonished that this thing called electronic mail that lecturers used to share notes, was able to go beyond the campus’ gateway and into my sister’s work inbox in Singapore.

Of course in between there was phone calls to chat, usually kept very short because of the costs of the call.

Texting was only available after my graduation and returning to Malaysia, and ICQ much later after that.

These days, we have this thing called Skype and Yahoo messenger where not only could we chat over voice, we could also see each other; and if this Daddee has his way (soon?), maybe this thing called Facetime as well

So anyway, Daddee is away from home. Caitlin knew full well days before my departure what the implications are; something I will come back to another time. But after almost a week away and video-chatting nearly everyday, I sincerely hope the kids are coping with my absence. They are staying with their grandparents who, with all due respect, are not as energetic as I am insofar as bringing them out to the parks, goofing around with them outside or on the floor, role playing with their toys, taking them for a swim.

In the video-chats Caitlin does save her comments for the day to share them with me. She would, albeit only very short and unfocused, share with me some thoughts or activities, or questions from something from her day- which I thought is nice. But she would naturally also ask when we’d be together again… In all, I still think that this is better than nothing at all, or at least what it used to be with me. Then again this is a 6 year old who can’t write well yet to correspond any other way.

Caleb would come on too sometimes, but most times he is more fascinated with seeing himself on the monitor and make faces just to see what it looked like on screen. He knows I am there, and we exchange greetings too, but that is really all we- I, can do for him at this stage.

So, I think they are coping okay for now; I wouldn’t say they are coping “well”.

At least from my perspective…

You are inquisitive:
You see things and you tell me you see them. Every single thing.

And then you go Right Daddee? Right?

You are like Mummee- independent, and OCD:
You wanna try things yourself, and you wanna do it your way. That is why if whatever you are attempting is being done wrong, we will never get out of there.

You are also sly:
You still pee in your pants; likely from being too lazy to stop whatever fun activity you are doing at the moment to go pee. And when you are caught, you change the subject hoping that your trouble with the adults will go away. Of course it won’t, and so you run away. Literally.

But above all, all these traits are better than you being the opposite of them!

Happy Birthday buddy!

For “all his life” Caleb has been used to coming along to the ride for dropping off Caitlin at her school every schoolday morning (Caleb is 3, and Caitlin has been at preschool for the last 3 years).

He is used to the route (yes he recognises the roads), the scenery on the way and of the front of the school, the teachers who help/walk the kids into the school, and the whole routine of Daddee then taking his time dropping him off at Grandma’s and then only to work.

Now that she is done with preschool, and with Daddee trying still to figure out the optimum way to ferry them around, he will have to stop calling her preschool “my school too”. For strange funny reasons, he does call her preschool his.

Quite adamantly. And for that, I for one have been using that to teach him to stop peeing in his pants. “PEE IN YOUR PANTS AGAIN? You can’t go to school yet then! Children who pee in their pants cannot go to school”, which of course isn’t true from what Caitlin tells me about her classmates!

Anyway, now that we are told to not walk the kids into the school, this may be my answer: Drop off jie-jie first, watch/ensure she does get in safely, then only drive off and drop Caleb at Grandma’s.

This may also allow the kids to sleep even-if-it’s-only 10 minutes longer, seeing as the new route/routine has to cater to longer commute time and traffic challenges.

I had not been inside before despite it being opened for years now, boasting the world’s largest indoor roller coaster. So what better opportune to bring the kids along.

We got there, saw and greeted kau-foo, got the free passes, and disappeared! How rude!

One of the rides that Caitlin had eagerly wanted to try was the bumper car. She had tried this once before when we went to Genting Highlands; where she froze upon the cars starting and other riders started to bump into her (read it here).

This time however, I guess she knew the objective of the ride, and wasn’t too miffed about being bumped into as much. However, whilst driving she was actually avoiding everyone as much as she could! I guess this was her first driving lesson, and not a bad one at that- I was watching her and she was avoiding “cars” quite well

Little brother Caleb however, I guess was going through what his jie-jie was going through on her first time. He wasn’t sure what to make of this. I could see he was hanging on (but not for dear life, probably cos he doesn’t know what to worry!) and looking everywhere. Perhaps he was getting motion sickness in that he wasn’t in control of the direction, and also the jerking whiplash stop-starting of the car.

When jie-jie wanted to go on it again, he opted out So we went on the train ride again

I think in all she went like 4 times

No, I am talking about an iPhone game that Caitlin has taken to.

It is called Tap Zoo.

So why am I talking about this?

I am quite glad I stumbled upon this game, actually.

A little like SimCity, the game presents an empty plot, which is actually an island, and Caitlin has some “capital” to play with to start building her zoo. Starting with small animals, Caitlin quickly learned that she cannot start spending too quickly (budget) on other animals and infrastructure, and has to wait (patience) for these small animals to earn (income) money when visitors come visit her zoo. As her earnings build (savings) only then can she start buying more expensive things.

I have tried to coach her on spending wisely on “more important” things, like building proper pavements, not needing too many rangers and keepers yet, etc, but I don’t think she gets those yet. Looks like town planning or architecture isn’t going to be something she will grow up to be You can see her poor attempt at building a footpath there! I have also tried to explain to her that selling those items does not get her back the same amount she paid the first time, that she had better planned it all first instead of buying and then selling it back at a loss.

Still, the game “plays by itself” in that it is saved over the cloud, and when she comes back to it later her income actually would have grown. So, recently she has been letting it earn her money, and quoting me her savings

Now that’s passive income! I should harp on this to her and make her think about “investing” in things that generate income without much effort.

Heh.

Hot Mummee and the two kids sent me to KL Sentral to catch the express train. It was just going to be a quick drive-by drop-off.

I gave HM a hug and kiss, hopped out the car while Caitlin climbed infront to take over the front seat; gave her a hug and kiss too, and did the same with Caleb in his child-seat in the back, whilst half-ignoring his “(wanna get out and) walk-walk, walk-walk“.

Walked across the driveway waving to them as they waved back and pulled away.

Soon afterwards I was already on the express train. HM called to see if I was.

She then told me that as they were pulling away Caitlin asked for a photo of me so that she can look at it to remember me with.

Awww….

HM suggested to Caitlin to look at our wedding photos instead; of which there are a few around our home. Apparently Caitlin screwed her nose at this idea…

Why?

HM thinks it’s because she is in them!

I spotted the latest issue of Time, and tried discretely to hide it behind some other mags.

“Daddee, why did you do that?”

“Doesn’t it scare you?”

“.. A little bit..”

Later I proceeded to tell her that some bad people had done that to her, “Just like those bad people who robbed us last year…”

I am not sure if I should shield her from these images, still. She is after all only turning 6 this November. Little brother Caleb didn’t appear to see that cover; in his little happy-happy-joy-joy world as usual

So we were on our way to a supermarket. I was running the shopping list verbally with her, play-testing if she can recall all the items we needed.

“Why don’t we make a shopping list?”

“Good idea, but I am driving….”

“I’ll do it.”

Hmm? She is going to school- yes, but I didn’t think she would be able to spell the items.

She proceeded to get the small notepad I keep in the car, and a pen. “What do we need to get again?”

“Some milk- two cartons, actually; yoghurt, those veggies Mummee needed for tonight’s dinner; oh and if we can find it, a case for Mummee’s phone…”

“Milk….. yoghurt……”, scribble scribble scribble. “Ok done.”

Can you see it?

She had scribbled out the yoghurt once it was in the shopping trolley, but you can just about make it out by the shape of the tubs that she had earlier coloured in

And, the phone that goes into a pouch!

Last night on a quick visit for some fresh milk I thought that a pack of Ribena sweets was okay for her. It was in a shiny packaging anyway; she didn’t miss it either. If the packaging is to be trusted it does contain vitamin C after all (or am I a marketers sucker-dream come true?)

So this morning on the way out to school and grandma’s respectively I was helping make sure that she does bring it along to school. Since the pack of 20 itself is rather large and didn’t quite fit into Caitlin’s uniform pocket, she passed it to me to carry in my shirt pocket.

Caleb saw.

That jie-jie was carrying something must be something I’d want too.

That she insisted Daddee carry it must be something I’d want too.

That is was also shiny must be something I’d want too…

“I WAAANT!”

This is where Hot Mummee’s complaints about my being biased may be justified. I didn’t want him to have one now because he’d just woken up. He hadn’t had anything to drink yet (water) let alone his morning milk- to have candy as “breakfast” or at least the first thing to eat isn’t quite an activity or habit I’d like to instil in the kids.

So what did Daddee say to discourage him?

Infront of Caitlin, I said to Caleb: “It’s medicine..”

Yikes.

She’d never questioned me at all or smirked at me. But I think I had done a bad thing. I could have said he could have one after his milk and insisted jie-jie shared one with him. But I didn’t. I could have simply said “Later” too, but I didn’t.

So now, Caitlin has learned a “skill” that I didn’t want her to know yet. She may well start applying this to other areas to fool us too, with the topic or severity growing as she does.

Oops.

These are quite typical memories we have and we conjure up, when we are bored or when we miss those times, and especially so, the people who helped create them.

We usually also conjure up these memories that are from “way back”, like from many years ago.

Well, sometimes, maybe only from a year ago…. Such as with a 5 year old child! Okay she’ll be 6 in November

Caitlin has been telling me about her current class’ friends, how such-and-such doesn’t want to befriend her anymore, and; more funnily- how some are fickle in that they do, and then don’t, and then do, and don’t, etc. She says these are “not-good” friends. Good friends are ones who stay be-friended to you.

Recall that Caitlin started pre-school at Pre-1 level in 2008, proceeded to Pre-3 in 2009 because they didn’t have Mandarin medium for the Pre-2 level.

It’s probably the case that she had “fonder” memories of the 2009 class than of this year’s. She did make some “notable” friends from that batch. She was accepted as one of them when she joined them at the start of 2009 as a complete stranger to the year-batch that had already been together from 2008. I recall when I dropped her off at school for that first day with that older batch. I peeped through the door to see what she’d do.

Start of some lasting friendships? My own older brother has a friend from waaay back. They are in their late-40′s now; they had known each other since kindergarten!

So this Daddee has made it a point to re-invite her friends from the previous class, who are now already in standard 1 this year, for Caitlin’s birthday party come November; together with her current classmates of 2010. I just hope their phone numbers are still valid…