So how many of us realise; and how often do we remind ourselves, that whatever we do, say, behave, respond to situations, treat our own loved ones and other fellow human beings, we are being watched by the little kids around us?
Sometimes when I make a passing remark, opinion, upcoming event or plans, Caitlin would recount it hours later asking for clarification. For example, there is an upcoming party for one of our cousin’s buck’s night party, so the kids will have to crash at Grandma’s for that evening. Hot Mummee called up Grandma to tell her of this plan. Caitlin was within earshot (and conducted in Cantonese even). She asked me about it later, why we have to make her sleep over at Grandma’s.
Yes she understood the whole arrangement and asked about the event; when we didn’t think her Cantonese was even that good!
My point is, we are their one and only role model in their still-little universe. As they see how Mummee and Daddee behave, as adults, and especially as a couple, they will slowly and surely subconsciously form the opinion that this is the way an adult, and a couple is supposed to behave.
Sure, we hold our tongues when we are about to cuss something that pisssed us right off, make sure we either change the channel or that they aren’t around when inappropriate tv-content comes on, but what about everyday behaviour? The way we drive, cuss at other drivers (if one is so inclined), jump queue? (I get asked this by Caitlin sometimes, but luckily I am a patient driver and I explain to her that there is no queue, merely changing lanes; HM on the other hand…. 
Our parents are the first couple-role model in our lives. I “realised” this when I was reading a self-help book many years ago when I was personally going through some difficult times- I believe the book is called Conscious Loving. From there, one can either choose to emulate, or go almost-opposite against, what they see of this model couple. I guess, in looking around, there are those who don’t realise this, and kinda almost emulate this model couple later in their adult life. I am generalising here, but folks with broken-family backgrounds tend to have similar relationships or choose not to commit. On a less serious level, families that speak very casually and loudly, almost rudely to their elders, tend to “spawn” the same type of behaviour in their kids.
Just somethings I have been casually thinking about lately, as a parent…..
So how do you behave in front of the “younglings”?
* Sorry, this is the first photo I used for this blog that isn’t originally mine! Courtesy of www.makemymood.com
It is a conscious effort to take what is good from our parents and learn from the ‘mistakes’ they made.
Yes….kids sure do look up to us. Good thing Caitlin questions…at least you have a chance to know what is in her mind and guide her properly.
.-= Ann´s last blog ..2nd Pregnancy =-.
I think you know Gadget-daddy and I well enough to know we behave well mannared all the time…. But the time-bomb in our house is the “other couple” (you also know who) who are always bickering and arguing and complaining to the kids. Man, that gnaws at my nerves all the time. And I am feeling like a time-bomb myself because I come from a family that hardly argues.
So, Yeah, I see what you mean, coz my folks, when my dad was still around, my mom would dote on him, making his favourite food, even go make supper for him when she was already in her PJ and in bed, while he was playing games on the Atari console. He would always cuddle her, even in front of us kids, make her laugh with his jokes and confide in her in many matters.
And this is pretty much a picture of gadget-daddy and I… especially the supper bit. Hahaha….
.-= Moomykin´s last blog ..Myron Is 6 Months Old =-.
p/s- Hey, you change your page again. I like the new look.
And glad you’re still keeping that smiley candle.
.-= Moomykin´s last blog ..Myron Is 6 Months Old =-.