Daddee Yah!

It is still clear in my head, the visual “playback” of my schoolmate’s reaction to my statement, & my reaction to his reaction; from so many years ago during a class break.

We were talking about what we do at home after school, during free time, etc. Don’t forget this is all pre-internet days!

“I get on my Atari and startup Pele Soccer…”

“I dunno; watch TV I guess. Maybe badminton or soccer..”

And I said “I chat with my mom..”

“You chat with your mum??” His reaction: How weird are you??

My reaction to his reaction: How weird to think that is weird.

Reflecting on this years later, it occurred to me that not everyone was as fortunate as I (we) were. Other than being a stay-home mum catering everyone’s need, & unlike my schoolmates’ mums who just provided food & shelter, mum was a person to really talk to, provided feedback & guidance, provided & sought our companionship.

It was these interactions with my mum that may have nurtured me into the parent that I (want to be) am today. I feel I can tell my mum anything (sometimes too much!) & not feel reprimanded for sharing. It also creates & maintains that bond which unites the family.

Above all, it is likening it to being “friends”. And as we all know, we can talk to friends about (almost) anything.

A chat with an ex senior management colleague echoed this. He said he treats his kids not with a parent-child relationship, but like they are friends.

I see this also practised especially with my older brother. From the start, he has been very interactive with his daughter & till today they speak like they are friends (as he is with Caitlin too today).

When Caitlin was born in the delivery room, I heard myself saying in my head: I am gonna (try and) be your best friend… OK, right after “Oh, it IS a girl!”

And thus the name of this site!